Today has been on of the most trying days of my life. We found out that out 2 embryos stopped dividing at day 3 so there is a 99% chance we won't make it to day 5/6 for testing.
No words is an understatement. How? Why?
I think the only thing that kept me going was the fact that I had a super busy day at work and it was a 15 hour work day at that. But I haven't had a chance to grieve. And DH...poor DH. He doesn't cry often but I could just see it break him when we finally got home from our long days and we were able to process this news together...in the same room.
I can't sleep. I can't eat. I just don't know what to do.
Oh and to place a big FU in my face, 3 pregnancy announcements on Facebook and a baby shower invite in the mail. How do you like that? Just in case you weren't having a bad day already, I just wanted to make sure.
Life is so freaking unfair. I said to DH tonight....'what did we do to deserve this' and his response was... 'Nothing and that's why it hurts so much'
And now I'm debating on whether or not to post something on Facebook about national infertility awareness week. Perfect timing, eh? While its a private matter, I'm so tired of the ignorance and stupidity of people. If only they knew the struggles of what others are going through.
It's 12:30 am and I can't sleep. I don't know what to do. Beyond words.
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