Funny but true

My husband knows me well. Yesterday he sent me this awesome, hilarious but oh so true ecard. It took every ounce of power in me not to post to Facebook after seeing 5 people in a row (no lie) complaining about pregnancy or their kids. So frustrating.

2013

2013 is tomorrow and I've been thinking about some changes I'm going to make.  I've never kept a new years resolution but hoping the idea of going through IVF will motivate me.  I want to be as healthiest as possible and these are some things that I can do to make that happen.  So...I'm sitting here enjoying my last diet dr. pepper until further notice (all soda for that matter).  In 2013 I hope to...

1. Cut out all soda and caffeine
2. Eat clean as much as possible
3. Work out before work in the morning or at lunch (instead of after work) at least 4x a week
4. Get to work early...before 7:30 everyday
5. Be more productive at work. Take things one task at a time and get things DONE

Also - before I start my stims in March, I want to lose 20lbs.  Hopefully these things above will help me do it. 

 

Cheers to 2013...You will be missed... :)

IVF Protocol

So here it is.  With the start of my period today...we are ready to go with starting the IVF process and our calendar.

Since we are doing IVF with PGS, there are only so many spots available at our clinic each month. We had to push everything off a month, so here's our plan...

Been on a slew of vitamins since 12/1/2012 - DHEA, Vitamin B, C, D, LCartine, Co-Q, Fish Oil, Prenatal (this one for 2+ years)...

12/31/2012 - Period Arrives
1/1/2013 - Start 4mg Estrace
2/11/2013 - Begin 10mg Provera daily for 7 days
2/17/2013 - Stop Estrace/Provera
2/22/2013 - If no period, call.  Begin BCP
3/05/2013 - Last BCP
3/05/2012 - Supression ultrasound and blood tests
3/07/2013 - DH and I take Z-Pak
3/08/2013 - Begin Dexamethasone, continue prenatal and start baby aspirin daily
3/08/2013 - Begin Microdos Lupron 10 Units, 12 hours apart
3/10/2013 - Begin Fertility Drug/Dosage
3/10/2013 - Begin Injections of Saizen 23 units (Growth Hormone)
3/12/2013 - Day 3 Labs
3/15/2013 - Day 6 Labs and Scan
3/18/2013 - Day 9/10 Labs and Scan
3/20/2013 - 3/22/2013 - Tentative ER
IVF with ICSI
Send off for PGS testing. FX!! FET 6-8 weeks later.

So there it is. I know plans change...but it feels good to have something down and in writing. :)

Mind-F

I hate IF and everything that comes with it.  Even with our DOR diagnosis last month, knowing we wouldn't be able to conceive on our own, silly stupid me still had hope. Maybe we could be that miracle conception couple. So frustrating...

It went down like this.  I hadn't let myself think for one minute I could be pregnant...that is until I felt like I was going to throw up in the middle of the day on Friday. Okay...no big deal. I was hungry and needed to eat.  So...Saturday rolls around and my boobs were sore. I mean...like really sore. I never get sore boobs...but maybe it's because of my period. But they were sore ALL day. I couldn't even shower without discomfort.  So..DH decides to go watch the UFC fight with some friends while I got caught up on my DVR.

The sore boobs still wouldn't go away, so I went looking for an HPT. I found one....took it...went to get the laundry...came back...and there was a second line.  It's the first time in my life I've seen a second line.  Was my mind playing tricks on me? I have no idea. It was so faint, it couldn't be. There's no way. Oh, and I forgot to mention that I had been spotting for a few days before...sure signs of AF. 

So the next morning, I told DH what had happened.  We went to buy some digital HPT...knowing that it couldn't be...but hoping that it could. Sure enough, a BFFN. "NOT PREGNANT" starred at me.

So now...I don't know what happened.  Was it a chemical pregnancy? Was I even pregnant at all? Man...I really hate IF and the mind-F games that it plays on you.  Even when you know you are out of the game on your own, you still have some sliver of hope it could be a miracle. 

Beagle Love

These are my loves, my life. They both have gotten me through some of my worst IF days. They cuddle close and show me unconditional love....as they are both curled up with me on the couch. ❤ my beagles

SATC Quote

To keep me going...I'm going to try and find positive, influential quotes along the way.  (Thank you Pinterest!)

I love this quote because I have always been a believer in everything happens for a reason.  While it's hard to find a reason why we are struggling through IF when so many others don't have to, I know there is a light at the end of the tunnel, one way or another. Oh...and I'm a huge fan of Sex and the City. :)

Miracle Quote

This is going to be my motivation and inspiration as we continue on this journey.  So many times we have been at the point of giving up, but we can't just yet. Hopefully our miracle will come soon...